How the Right Attitude Can Make Such A Difference in Your Separation or Divorce!
Your attitude in dealing with your spouse in your separation or divorce has a significant impact on the results of trying to settle your family law issues.
You must carefully think about and plan your approach and attitude when you speak to your spouse and you are in their physical presence before and after your actual separation.
Your plan and attitude can make the difference between a relatively friendly divorce and a more difficult divorce.
Hi, my name is Thomas O’Malley. I’m an experienced family lawyer in Durham Region and the GTA.
Your planning and strategy play out in many different situations.
Many spouses, for example, continue to live in the same residence or house after they have separated.
You can definitely be separated from your spouse even though you both continue to live in the same residence. At this point, you and your spouse most likely have different sleeping arrangements with one spouse sleeping in the bedroom and the other spouse sleeping in another bedroom or sleeping on the couch in the basement.
Obviously, when spouses continue to live in the same house after they have separated, tension between the spouses can be very high.
In fact, the tension often increases the longer the spouses continue to live in the same residence.
When you continue to live with your spouse in the same house, try to establish a set routine so that you minimize your contact with your spouse.
If your spouse works certain hours, you can be at home at these times but minimize as much as possible the time you and your spouse are physically present at the residence at the same time. This will keep the tension to a minimum.
You are more likely to successfully negotiate a separation agreement with your spouse when you minimize the tension in this situation.
You will even increase the chance that you get a settlement with your spouse even when you are in court over your outstanding family law issues.
You might consider moving out of the residence if the tension really gets too unbearable.
Remember you will not lose your legal interest in the home if you move out of the home. But, as a practical matter, it will be very difficult for you to move into the residence again after you have moved out the first time.
An important exception to this approach occurs when you are the primary caregiver for your children. Never move out of the residence on a permanent basis without your children if you are the primary caregiver.
Where you move out of the house on a permanent basis and leave the children in the care of your spouse, you will create a new pattern or situation respecting the custody and care of your children.
You will find it very difficult, if not impossible, to change this new custody and care arrangement at some time in the future.
If you try to get custody and care of your children, for example, three or four months later, by having your children live with you at your new residence on a full-time basis, the chances of your success are not that good.
Make sure you spend some time with your family lawyer discussing this important issue in your separation or divorce.
If you have any questions about your separation, divorce or family law case and you would like our help, there’s a few ways to contact our office.
You can leave a message on my Facebook law office page, visit my website at www.canadiandivorcelegaladvice.com, or call me directly at 905-434-8837. We would be happy to speak to you.
Oh, by the way, did you know you can protect your family law rights and get essential information on settling your family law issues with your former spouse with the daily indispensable family law advice and tips at my FREE Facebook group?
Click here for more information: Durham Region Separation and Divorce Legal Support Group
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