How to Make The Right Decisions in Your Separation or Divorce!

How to Make The Right Decisions in Your Separation or Divorce!

If I could show you how to make the right decisions in your separation or divorce, would that interest you?

I thought it might!

Hi, my name is Thomas O’Malley.  I’m an experienced family lawyer in Durham Region and the GTA.

As I discussed in another video, decision fatigue is the true killer of making the right decisions in your separation or divorce. 

Decision fatigue refers to situations in which you are forced to make life-changing decisions in your life when you are already in a “hurried” state of mind in your life. 

And undoubtedly, you must make life-changing decisions to resolve your family law issues.

Here’s some critical ways to avoid or reduce decision fatigue so that you make the right decisions in your separation or divorce:

1.   Know Your Goals Before You Negotiate Anything

You must negotiate with your former spouse to get a good settlement 

One really important way to make sure you don’t get overwhelmed and give away the “farm” in your negotiations is to know exactly what you want to achieve. 

Keep this list with you with your paperwork when you and your lawyer are negotiating a settlement in-person or virtually online, such as using Zoom for a negotiation meeting with your former spouse.

You must discuss these goals with your lawyer in advance so that you are both approaching the negotiations from the same point of view.

2.  Don’t Get Involved with Long Negotiation Sessions

You can only stay fresh and think clearly on important issues for short-periods of time. 

I have found with my clients that two hours is about the limit for negotiating a settlement with their ex-spouse and lawyer. 

You can negotiate longer that day as long as you take 30-minute breaks or longer so that you can refresh your mind and stay calm.

3.  When You Are Feeling Really Pressured to Sign A Settlement You Don’t Like, Don’t Do It!

If you are getting tired and your spouse and their lawyer is putting some serious pressure on you to sign a deal, don’t do it. 

Here’s the test:  follow your intuition or gut instinct.  If you don’t feel and the proposed settlement is right for you and you re getting pressured to sign it, just don’t do it.

Take some time to discuss your goals with your family lawyer.  Then set your own proposal to settle your family law issues to your former spouse.

4.  Schedule Your Important Meetings About Your Separation and Divorce Only When You are Normally Feel Good and Energized!

Most people have parts of the day in which they usually feel better and more energized.

For example, many people are more active and make their best decisions in the morning.

Only negotiate and have meetings in the morning when that is the most effective part of the day for you.

5.   Take Control of Your Mind

You are much stronger person than you realize.  You much greater inner resources that can use than you think you do.

Start just taking some quiet time in the morning or evening so that you can refresh yourself and re-charge your mental batteries.

This will pay off some serious dividends for you when you are making really important life decisions, especially in your separation or divorce.

If you have any questions about your separation, divorce or family law case and you would like our help, there’s a few ways to contact our office.  You can leave a message on my Facebook law office page, visit my website at www.canadiandivorcelegaladvice.com, or call me directly at 905-434-8837. 

We would be happy to speak to you.

Oh, by the way, did you know you can protect your family law rights and get essential information on settling your family law issues with your former spouse with the daily indispensable family law advice and tips at my FREE Facebook group? 

Click here to find out more: Durham Region Separation and Divorce Legal Support Group