How This One Problem Can Make It Really Hard To Solve Your Family Law Issues in Your Separation or Divorce!

How This One Problem Can Make It Really Hard To Solve Your Family Law Issues in Your Separation or Divorce!

The key to success in your separation or divorce is knowing the difference between myths and misconceptions about the separation and divorce process and the real truth about this difficult process.

I discuss another big misconception about the separation and divorce process in this video.

Hi, my name is Thomas O’Malley.  I’m an experienced family lawyer in Durham Region and the GTA.

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Many clients believe that one of the purposes of the separation and divorce process is to show that their spouse is a real jerk and simply a bad person. 

Now that belief is quite understandable when you’re dealing with one of the most difficult times in your life.  You’ve been hurt and you need a way to express this hurt and other negative feelings about this terrible situation in your life.

However, the separation and divorce process from a legal point of view is the wrong place to vent your emotions and frustrations.

Many clients want their family lawyer to write letters to their former spouse or their lawyer telling them nasty things about their ex-spouse.

They want their family lawyer to put in every nasty and bad thing that they come up with in their court paperwork.

However, this simply does not help you “win” in your separation or divorce.   You need to vent your frustration and anger about your separation or divorce with your friends and family members.

Now, if there are key facts that show that your ex-spouse is abusive or neglects the children, those facts should certainly be set out in your court paperwork.

One of the best ways to cope with your separation or divorce is to have a solid support network of friends and family members. 

You should also seriously consider personal counselling to help with the difficult emotional side of going through as separation or divorce.

You need to take a calm, business-like approach to your separation or divorce to get the best results.

For example, you cannot judge whether a settlement offer from your former spouse is fair or not when you are considering the terms of the proposed offer through the lens of anger and negativity.

You need to review a proposed settlement offer from a calm, business-like point of view.   Then you will know whether it’s a good settlement for you based on the facts of your situation and the advice of your family lawyer.

You should also know that a judge is not interested in hearing that your ex-spouse is a bad or nasty person.  The judge wants to hear about the key issues in the case and then the judge will make recommendations based on the important facts about your case.

Here’s the bottom line:  You inevitably will feel frustration, anger and hurt in your separation or divorce.  That’s completely understandable.  I would be surprised if you didn’t.  And it’s healthy to let out these emotions.  However, the legal side of the separation and divorce process is not the place to express those emotions.  Leave that to a solid support network and good personal counselling.

If you have any questions about your separation, divorce or family law case and you would like our help, feel free to contact on my Facebook law office page, that’s O’Malley Family Law, or call me at 905-434-8837 and I’ll point in you in the right direction. 

Click here to join my free Facebook GTA and Durham Region separation and divorce support group: GTA and Durham Region Separation and Divorce Support Group

Please make sure to share this important information and video with your friends, family members and co-workers so that it helps more people avoid serious problems in their separation or divorce before it’s too late.